The days of Lent 2025 have brought me to another phase of my spiritual journey. The urgencies of life have intermingled with the role of caregiving for my beloved husband of 48 years. From mid-February to the first days of April, Richard suffered from a silent disease, a rare type of cancer, a neuroendocrine tumor of the pancreas that metastasized to the liver. His life was filled with celebrations, challenges, and devotion to his family.
Family, neighbors, friends, and the medical care of the Virginia Cancer Specialists helped Richard navigate the reality of his life. As with any cancer disease, there were challenges, sorrows, and a tremendous amount of unease. Faith and hope led me forward as I tried to be a caregiver.
When I heard that my Spiritual Journey community of writers and poets under the direction of Ruth Hersey were writing poems of lament, I knew the Lord was with me. I desired to write but each day as a caregiver left me with little time to write. Thoughts were floating in my head, waiting for spaces of time to let my heart speak on the theme of lament during Richard's and my Lenten journey. The lament format can be found in the Bible Psalms. There are approximately 65 Psalms in the Bible that are poems of lament. These poems express sorrow, grief, pleas for help, and deliverance to God. They address the Lord, share complaints, express emotions, ask for the Divine help, and vow to continue to trust, hope, and praise.
My lament poem narrates the ending days of my beloved husband's life. His quality of life was compromised but through the kindness of the medical teams, family, and friends he found his way to unburden his sorrow. With hope and faith surrounding him, Richard was provided a forever resting place.
Last Days of Richard's Spiritual Journey
In the sterile silence,
Drifting words rose
From the depths of his soul
Into the morning light.
I wish I had four more months!
The ordeal of terminal illness,
Filled his eyes with unquestionable fear.
I prayed seeking answers.
When will this sorrow end, Lord?
Between restless sleep and days
Of not eating or barely drinking,
He whispered to me,
You know what is happening!
My heart broke hearing the truth.
How could I soothe his tattered soul?
Tears continued to flow; inner turmoil
increased. Cancer tore his soul as
Sorrow sneaked into the room
Splitting quiet in half.
Be gentle with your breath!
Let go of fears!
Repetitive requests to take medicine
were negated. Agitation increased.
Lord, please hear my prayer!
With haste, an on-call oncologist advised
An emergency hospital visit.
The 911 team responded within minutes.
Uneasiness floated through the air.
Time slipped by as the ravaged body
Fought for some renewed comfort.
The plea to return home became impossible.
When did months turn into days, Lord?
Three days later, a transport arrived
For his journey to the hospice center,
A place of serene quiet. Life
Unexpectedly turned a corner.
Tears fell like dewdrops in spring.
The inevitable happened.
Nurses gathered; the chaplain prayed.
The priest performed the last rites.
Hope soared upward on the
Ever-present wings of love.
The hands of the Lord opened
Offering the gift of a forever home.
Praise to you, Lord, for the blessing!
His spirit ascended into the inked sky.
Draft ©CVarsalona, April 2025
↴
life was shortened
unforeseen happening
nature shared its blooms.
©CVarsalona, 2025 photo and poem
Stop by to be dazzled by Irene's poems and many other writers' work.
NOTE: Later today, a Funeral Mass will be held at St. John Neumann Church in Reston, VA. Richard will find his place among the angels and stars.
I will read the roundup blogs when I can.
I add this lament poem to my 2025 National Poetry Month Project.
