Celebrating, Not Mourning, Life

At the end of our nine days of celebrating my husband's life I found peace in the gentle waters of sunset. Golden layers of sky surroundied the harbor.  It was time to pause and gaze at nature's reflections and remember past layered memories.

summer sweltered

gentle waters shared stillness

sunset celebrated

sunset spoke

of life's celebration

stilled waters agreed

©CV, August 2025 

One of my writing friends, Bob Hamera (aka arjeha), offered a quieting thought to me. "Life should be celebrated not mourned."  I brought that quote on my family's trips to various ocean spots. I step back now thinking that it was peaceful to shift my focus from mourning the loss of my husband to honoring  the life lived and the impact it had on others. The celebration of life ceremonies during the nine days offered comfort and remembrance in a special way.

Thank you to Ralph Waldo Emerson for his beautiful quoteL

"Every sunset brings the promise of a new dawn."

Now that I am home in Virginia, I shall remember to walk forward in peace.

nature's stilled waters

offers solace

My Slice of Life 

for Two Writing Teachers

A meeting place for a world of reflective writers.

Celebrating Life With Family

What is life without a loving family? 

Ever since I was a child, I felt the closeness of family even during challenging times. This year, during springtime, sorrow and loss unexpectedly interrupted our family life when my husband Richard fell prey to an incurable, silent disease. Cancer swept across his body as quickly as mighty waves moving across the ocean. My family withstood the rush of anguish and a heart-rending situation, yet we prepared for a family trip to the Atlantic Ocean in Cape May, New Jersey, and the south shore of Long Island, NY, to honor my husband's life. 

As we drove to the ocean sites, I followed the inspiration of Albert Einstein. "Rejoice with your family in the beautiful land of life". We felt the glow of sunshine streaming down on us as wind-driven waves rushed in with diamond-sparkling effects and quickly returned seaward. The first seaside landing in Cape Map allowed our extended family to enjoy the children frolicking in the water, the delicious seafood, and creamery ice cream delights. We lived life as a summer vacation should be, and yet we remembered that one member of the group was missing. 

As our immediate family traveled north to Long Island, we eagerly prepared for the Celebration of Life ceremony at Jones Beach's Field 6. The beach was quiet. As we moved closer to the ocean, we watched the constant flow and backrush of ocean waves. The ebb and flow of the tides brought peace to the ceremony. Readers' words flowed across the sea. My mind floated like the waves, not about sorrowful days but to present moments. The seagulls flew across the South Shore beach, squawking in tune with the crash of the waves. The magnificent ocean at Jones Beach, Long Island, NY, offered a private place to honor a man with whom I spent close to 49 years of marriage. I was present, my mind was cleared of daily busyness, and I seemed to float with the rhythm of the tides as I looked across the horizon.

not a day to mourn

but one to celebrate life

peaceful souls connect

©CV, July 31, 2025 

I now think of that day at the majestic ocean. We brought the immediate family together and linked our souls with Richard's. There was a powerful release of tension, loneliness, and grief. "Ocean separates lands, not souls".  (Munia Khan) 

" Say not in grief ' he is no more' but in thanfulness that he was."

Hebrew Proverb 

For me, without family, life spins in an unsettled world.

I am thankful for my family, their love, and support,

and the tiny heart shell that was my heaven-sent sign at the shore.

Today is Spiritual Journey Thursday (SJT). Leigh Anne Eck is our host today. She chose the prompt, family, for each writer to ponder. This is a powerful prompt for me. Please visit her blog post here to enjoy the blog posts on "family". Leigh Anne is sharing about her Mother, who recently passed away. My thoughts and prayers go out to her and her family.

I am also sending this blog post to Molly Hogan at Nix the Comfort Zone. I have missed the last two Poetry Friday Roundups because we were enjoying 9 days of celebrating my husband's life. Now, I am ready to settle down and find a respite through reading both SJT and Poetry Friday blog posts from two different writing communities. I already read Holly's post that provided a look into nature and the word pause.

Nature as a Healer

"Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where Nature may heal and cheer and give strength to body and soul alike." -John Muir

When I read this quote in one of Carol Labuzzetta's blogs, I quicky recorded it in my digital journal. I knew that the family would feel the restorative power of nature in another week. We will travel to Cape May and the South Shore of Long Island, NY to celebrate the life of my husband, as per his request. Click here to read my recent Slice of Life. 

Being in nature for nine days brings a smile. There will be time to pause and relax, remembering the summers of our lives basking in sunkissed sands and my husband's stories of his early life when he romped in the surf with his friends. I also remember our summer days when our children were young. We enjoyed the warming sun's rays, the coolness of the ocean's waters spraying our bodies, and the many walks on the boardwalk. Little did we know back then that our family's life would change radically as my husband's days on earth quickly faded.

I think back on John Muir's quote, knowing that soon nature will provide peace to my soul and healing to my emotions and body. The warmth of the sand, the beauty of the sea, and the calling of the gulls will bring me home to Richard's sacred place. 

He provided an intinerary for our celebration of life so we will honor his wishes. While he did not include Cape May in his plan, we will travel there first and remember our time together. Then, we will drive to Long Beach, Long Island to return to Jones Beach, Field 6. There we will send our fondest memories from the ocean waves to Richard's new home above. 

Join me as I let nature bring its restorative powers of healing to each member of my family. 

during summer days

nature nurtures bodies and souls

finds pathways to peace

on quiet walks warmed by sands

gifts of solace comfort life

you look downward

from heaven's golden seat

wishes of love float

 ©CVarsalona, summer of 2025, draft

digital art of a Long Island Beach

🌞

It's time to offer my thoughts about my husband's Celebration of Life at the shores of Cape May, NJ and Long Island, NY. My Floridian poet friend and book lover, Jan Annino, is hosting the Poetry Friday Roundup. Her blog post, Resilience, is interesting and starts off with a photo of a manatee enjoying his time floating followed by questions for readers. "Do you need a pause? Do you yearn to just drift? Besides Jan's post, she introduces each poet/writer and the poetic goodness that they are sharing.

REMEMBER

This week life came full circle. Both a new birth and a passing from life occurred in my family. While contemplating how life meets at crossroads, I turned to poetry to let thoughts surface like spring blooms. Coincidentally, my friend Ramona Behnke wrote a post sharing Poet Laureate Joy Harjo's poem Remember. It touched me so much that it became a mentor text for a silent conversation poem between my 94-year-old uncle and me during his last days in hospice. Because I live in Virginia and he is in Central NY, I could not travel to his bedside. The poem became my way of honoring his life.

Joy Harjo has said, "Poetry is like singing on paper". I celebrate my Uncle John's life through verse with the hope that he is spiritually close by listening to the lines.

Remember. . .

Remember the beginning as your mother cradled you into this world.

Remember receiving your father's name.

Remember your patriotic duties during wartime.

Remember your return to civilian life and stepping into college and a new career.

Remember your flights around the globe.

Remember your devotion to family and faith.

Remember your heritage and the delicious meals your mother prepared.

Remember your challenges and joys.

Remember your independent spirit and your willingness to support others.

Remember your nimble fingers creating crosses made of palms.

Remember your niece holding your hand and your family sending thoughts and    

     prayers from a distance. 

Remember your brother and sisters who are waiting to embrace you in eternity.

Remember the Lord is with you in your silent moments.

Remember!

©CarolVarsalona, oldest niece, written during John's final days at Francis House, 2023

These poetic lines from Harjo's poem remind me of the immensity of the world, the possibilities it holds for each individual, and the celebration of life. 

Remember you are this universe and this

universe is you.

The above poem will be featured in my Uncle's funeral program and read by m eat the gravesite next week. Now, I offer this post for Poetry Friday at Patricia Franz's blog, Reverie. She is celebrating 40 years of marriage and sending Memorial Day weekend wishes to all. Thank you, Patricia for accepting my poetic offering so late.

My antique postcard above reminds me to fill this Memorial Day Weekend with praise for my uncle, a veteran of World War II who enlisted in the Marine Corps at a young age.

His memory and the memory of so many other veterans are remembered throughout this weekend. 

☆☆☆☆☆☆

Patricia Franz invites the Poetry Friday community to enjoy some poetry-bathing this weekend. I look forward to reading other poet friends' poetic offerings.

☆HAPPY POETRY FRIDAY☆

and

March Musings #3: Celebrate This Week

One day warm enough to walk outside with a light jacket-another day bundled up to stay grounded during a nor'easter - strange weather patterns happened this week. 

While it was great getting outdoors for a walk in the sunshine, the sudden change created quite a stir on Long Island. Unfortunately, many limbs from our majestic trees in the neighborhood were strewn around the ground with remnants of thrown-over garbage cans.

The good news is that the expected power outage on Friday never happened so I was able to continue baking for the Sunday Oscar parting my family and I are attending. 

But then this morning, I opened a text from my daughter that was dated last night. During the nor'easter two of the trees on their property toppled over and landed very close to their home. "We're at a hotel." 

Shocked by the news, I scurried to make a call and then, a Google Hangout to see that everyone was fine.  Relieved that all was okay for the time being, we said our goodbyes and would wait for more news. Stay tuned...

🙋While there may have been uncomfortable situations this week, the positives outweigh the issues. At Mass tonight, I was thankful and felt blessed.

Each week Ruth Ayres Celebrates This Week at her blog site. I am grateful for this writing community that celebrates the positives of life. I am also grateful for the March Slice of Life writing community at Two Writing Teachers.

                                                Day 3

March Musings 27: Gratitude

On World Poetry Day 2017, I wrote, "Stories unfold each day as we observe the world around us but do we pause to notice the sounds of life?" Today, as I departed Virginia for New York, I paused in gratitude for the wonders of life. Thoughts emerged as I looked out onto nature.

In the awakening of day, reflecting on gratitude for special moments becomes a celebration of life.

Today, I am offering my writing to Two Writing Teachers for the March Slice of Life Story Challenge. This is my twenty-seventh posting in a series titled March Musings.

Update: Now that my family's birthday celebration weekend is over, I will return to completing the design of my Winter Wonder Gallery. 
Stay tuned. Some slicers have contributed.